my 26th year.

first of all, in case no one knew, yesterday was my birthday! i turned 27. even typing that number i think "i'm still a baby!" but i thought i'd write some of the big lessons i've learned in my 26th year. because, well, it was one of the craziest years of our lives!

let's start with money. i learned so much about money in my 26th year! i had the book knowledge (and the dave ramsey rules) but never the "God has full and total sovereignty over my bank account" knowledge. wow, what a lesson. as you can only imagine, we racked up some serious medical debt in my 26th year. i had 3 surgeries. i can still remember just getting the doctor's bill for my big surgery. i cried and cried and cried, then took two benadryl and fell asleep, hoping i wouldn't remember all those numbers on that page. i ended up getting over myself, called the hospital and got set up on a payment plan. when i have to pay that bill every month, it's still painful. but what God taught me is that the money didn't matter. He had a bigger plan for my life, and without those doctors and hospitals that we are paying back, i wouldn't be here to write this blog post. God showed me that money and security is such an easy idol for me to worship (surprise, surprise). it was a brutal and beautiful lesson.

that i could actually love something more than myself for an extended period of time. you guys. i can feel tears welling up just thinking about this lesson. kids, and children, and babies, and foster care, and my heart just expanded. right now, there is an almost 6 month old in the next room, sleeping in her crib with her fat cheek smashed so much that you can't even see her closed eye. that baby has taught me lesson after lesson in my 26th year, but mainly that there is indeed someone in the world that i would do anything for. there isn't a single day that goes by that i don't think about the others that have stayed in this home in my 26th year. i don't get a high return on these investments, and i probably never will - and it's amazing that my selfish self can still love them so deeply. and if baby j ends up going home in my 27th year, that will be a whole new lesson.

that my husband is my bestie for the restie. stefen and i have seen dark days in my 26th year, to be honest. we have come to be closer than ever, but not without lesson after lesson. i can look at my husband today and say that he IS my better half (whatever that even means...), and that he is my teammate and my best friend. i love our love story, and the craziness of my 26th year is definitely included in that.

that i don't know anything. this one is self-explanatory. i'm always learning, asking questions, picking apart people's brains (welllll, at least the people who i think are doing things right...). at the end of the day, i am still completely reliant on God's grace to give me new mercies every morning. when i fail as a wife, a mother, a follower of Christ.

so what's on the agenda for year 27? i think we may close our foster home. i think we may take a long vacation somewhere cold. i think we may adopt. i think we will pay off of our debt. i think we may give more. i think we may love each other better. i think we may counsel, and be counseled more. and i'm going to try really hard not to obtain (in one way or another) any more animals in my 27th year.

thanks for reading!
chelsie